I really am writing this because it feels like it's been awhile since I last wrote something.

Jason is temporarily living with me, after which he'll be off to some other city. He sure has a lot of stuff. Fortunately, I did have a completely empty room for him, and I have a lot of space in my basement. It's amusing that I'm getting the huge safe back that transferred to him after I couldn't move it several moves ago. He also has significantly more energy than I do in satisfying his aesthetic sense -- I knew I wanted plants, and had several other things that I was thinking about doing to make my place look nicer, but had delayed doing them, for no reason really, for a long time. Immediately after he moves in, there are plants everywhere, and things are rearranged a bit here and there, looking much nicer. I keep thinking "why didn't I do that"... He always did have a knack at that sort of thing.

I am bored at work. I wish I had more stuff there to engage my programming side. In a way, this is a longer length replay of my job .. well, apprenticeship in the Workstation Support Group. Boredom, trivial tasks, and people all around me doing jobs that look more interesting. It's not really terrible -- I'm not unhappy, and I do feel like I'm getting over something that isn't quite abuse at the old job. Still, I don't think I can possibly get the respect I want in my current position. The problem really is that the person up on the totem pole, the CTO, really knows his stuff, and has his hands in everything. I think that I envy him for his position, and I probably feel a bit threatened by his knowledge. On technical matters, he's probably the one person that I know right now that I'd be tempted to call my equal. I have too little data, but perhaps in some other intellectual areas as well. We have similarities in several aspects, and I really am not used to having real competition in the areas where I excel. It's a bit emotionally difficult for me to deal with actually being in contact with someone I consider a technical equal, much less being both under them and restricted in duty to part of my abilities. I like programming. I like being considered the one who knows stuff. I like keeping systems healthy and happy. This is pretty strange for me. I suppose I consider it a free lesson in humility that I'm getting. Still, I suppose in the limited capacity I'm being used in, I'm doing okay. I will just need to learn to stifle my competitive urges. I had this in the UTS Support Center job too -- I was considered to be the most technically adept person there, but also to be arrogant and probably overly competitive.

Recently, for the first time ever, I've been having trouble breathing. It's not a huge problem -- breathing is just a little more difficult.. but I'm yawning a *LOT*, and it's getting irritating. I hope it's just allergies.

I recently joined two mailing lists. I was invited to join something called mentalfloss2 after someone there happened on my webpage and invited me. I also joined a transhumanist mailing list. First, on the transhumanist mailing list, someone joined and spouted some conservative racist crap. They were kicked off that list, but not before a discussion on the limits of tolerance (that reminded me of the speech I gave semi-recently on the topic). Then, just tonight, that same person posted the same thing to mentalfloss2. This time, I wrote a nice long reply attacking his position. Well, it wasn't exactly his -- it was an essay that was written, I believe, by someone else. I really don't understand that mentality -- is this something that people really think will be effective? Jumping from mailing list to mailing list posting the same thing that one doesn't even write -- it seems like a kind of odd and lonely existence. I really wonder about the psychology behind it. I think he hopes he can catch more people who listen more to the emotional appeal of his paper than the logic. It's very easy to be seduced by someone telling you what you want to hear, and people are often very forgiving to faults in arguments that tell them what they want to hear. It's probably a dilemma that people often come across -- what is to be done with people that share your conclusions, but for the wrong reasons.. Do you value the cause more than you value proper thought (or whatever else might be at stake..).

I'd write more, but I'm actually getting visual artifacts in my vision from being so sleepy. Those shelter volunteer days can actually take enough out of me that I'm still tired later in the week. I need to space them better. SFF had a fun water balloon/squirt gun time today that I went to. I had another heart episode during it. That actually might be another reason I'm so incredibly tired -- it takes a lot out of me. Hehe.. I'm on Frank (my laptop)... Push the button, Frank...