Time Heals All Wounds.. And Then Kills the Patient
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Mon Aug 13 04:50:15 2001
Discontent and Peace

Have been wondering about my style of life. There's a faction in me that seems discontent with the quiet peace that I have brought into my life by my philosophy. I watch others live complex lives, pain, tears, and ludicrous happiness all dancing around each other like a ferris wheel. I feel that I am perhaps at the center, almost still, where I can still feel the spokes a bit, but am hardly affected by them. My desire for peace is dominant now, and likely will be for the forseeable future, but I suppose the faction within me that is discontent will probably continue to feel jealous for what I have been trying to avoid. It envies the hurt that I sees around me, and feels stifled and dead, unneeded in my simple life. Oh tactical and feeling faction, I know you cannot, but I heed you to rest! Parts of you would be satisfied with merely being consumed with me loving again, and it concievably may happen sometime in the future. In honesty, it probably will not, but be satisfied with the hope! The angst you would welcome would destroy us all, and bring to an end our role as a philosopher.